Thursday, August 10, 2006


I work for a dance school in Buckhead. Every year, for our children's recital, I play a different character and my story line ties all of the themed dances together. My character also adds a little adult humor for our parents to enjoy.

One year, I played "Mother Goose" while I was 3 months pregnant with Charlotte. I was extremely sick with morning sickness and had to perform during four different shows that day - EACH an hour long. I would go onstage, completely disheveled, say my lines, make thousands of mistakes and drop props all over the stage..... and then go throw up. Needless to say, I was not the hit of the show THAT year.

A couple of times I even blacked out - but THE SHOW MUST GO ON. I had throw up in my wig and I smelled like HELL from it. The young dancers back stage didn't understand why Mother Goose was lying on the floor. "What's wrong with that lady?" " Why is she so sweaty?" It was AWFUL!!!!!!!! I was so embarrased with my performance that year.

Oh-h-h-h, I have so many throw up stories during my pregnacy.

One big part of my morning sickness was that I simply couldn't bare certain smells. The first month, I made Pete completely sanitize the freezer and scrub down the fireplace. I didn't like THOSE smells. I smile when I think of him down on his hands and knees scrubbing his heart out with clorox and ajax.

The very worst smell was GARLIC.

I could smell it on people's breath, 10 miles away and I even smelled it in car exhaust for some reason. One time, a girl gave me a hug and I smelled garlic. I gagged like crazy during our embrace and quietly threw up in my mouth. I was so embarresed and just nodded when she asked me a question. I quickly dashed to the bathroom and got rid of it - and then threw up some more because I had throw up in my mouth.

I threw up so much during my pregnancy that I lost 30 pounds and broke millions of blood vessels around my eyes. I would not say that I was a glowing pregnant woman.

One horrible time, Pete and I had just been to the doctor at Piedmont and we stopped by "Harry's In A Hurry" to get some fresh fruit and a salad to take back to my office. The only food I could tolerate was FRESH, COLD food. I rolled down the window to get some air and of course I smelled garlic. I started gagging immediatly and Pete quickly grabbed the "Harry's In A Hurry Bag" with all of our fresh items and I threw up all over it. I was out of control and couldn't stop, and now Pete was gagging from watching me throw up. So he pulled in behind Fellini's in this big parking lot. I got out and continued to throw up on the road and Pete is barfing out his side of the car. This made me laugh so hard and the force of the gagging and laughing caused me to start peeing on the ground (thank God I have a skirt on so I could just aim for the asphalt). There were a lot of people milling around back behind the restaurants and stores and all they could see was a combination barf-arama, laugh-fest and pee-athon. It was so funny and I was SO nasty after that.

I also threw up in the produce section of Walmart. I quickly grabbed a plastic bag and threw my guts up next to the Fresh Georgia Peaches. This stupid kid kept looking at me (he was probably scared to death) and I said, "What??? Stop looking at me!". Then I heard a voice over in the deli section. It said, "Sugar, you just throw up all you want. How far along are ya? Four months? Oh honey I was sick my entire pregnancy with all three of my kids. I know how your feelin". So I walked around Wal Mart with a bag of throw up until I could finally find a trash can.

I also threw up in my car several times. The final time, I was so sick of getting my clothes dirty, so I tried to aim for the passenger side floor mat. I had perfect aim and only swerved into the other lane about 3 times. I got to the Studio, washed off my floor mat, squirted a little windex on the stain (windex is miraculous for throw up), popped some gum in my mouth and went into work.

Dispite my sickness, I never missed one day of work while pregnant. The medal ceremony will be at 1:00pm tommorow!